This is a movie review, therefore it will have spoilers. Hence, if you do NOT want to be spoiled, do NOT read this entry, it’s a bit impossible to talk about a movie without spoiling the movie even somewhat, and I NEED TO TALK ABOUT THAT ENDED.
That being said. Are midnight premieres even a thing? Do they even exist anymore?
One of my favorite midnight premiere memories was for one of the Harry Potter movies, I want to say it was the 6th movie, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. Craig and I went to one of our favorite theaters in New Jersey. It was one of my favorite theaters, personally because on the way home we’d be able to stop at Sonic for drinks. See in Northern NJ, we got our first Sonic in 2009 and IT WAS A HUGE FUCKING DEAL. We didn’t have Sonics in NJ, but we had Wawa in South Jersey, and Sheetz in Pennsylvania, both which are AMAZING, and places I dearly miss now that I live in Texas and there’s literally a Sonic every other block.
Anyhow, I digress, sorry I’m too busy thinking about how much I miss Wawa Sandwiches and Drinks.
Anyhow Harry Potter nerds are a thing, and they were a big thing, and the midnight premiere for Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince was a big fucking deal. I dressed up a Slytherin student, and so many other people were dressed up, as well, I distinctly remember there being somebody who was dressed up as Gandalf, and somebody dressed up as Dumbledore, and they legit had a wand/staff fight before the movie started. I didn’t get home till close to three or four am that night and it was TOTALLY worth it [though this was way before I had an actual job, I miss the freedom you have a college student!]
I remember when the first Avenger’s came out in 2012. My friend Craig and I went to see the midnight premiere for it and this was before theaters were all swanky and had recliners and you could reserve seats. People waited for hours to get good seats, and there was a huge line in the theater for the movie. Craig and I had bought our tickets early for the movie, but we didn’t get there early enough, and we wound up having to sit in the front and literally strain our necks to see the actual screen, but it was totally worth it to see the movie at midnight on Friday [technically 11:59 on Thursday].
But now you can buy tickets for the movie on Thursday, and the showings aren’t even at midnight, they’re all throughout the day. As a nation, we’ve just become spoiled when it comes to movies. I miss the excitement and the audience participation that came with midnight premieres, people were just so into the movie, and there was collective cheering, and even applause at the end.
Anyhow, enough of the nostalgia and onto the movie.
SPOILER ALERTS FROM HERE ON!!!
If you need a reminder of the Marvel cinematic universe up to this point, may I direct you to this video…
AGAIN SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT
You can’t accuse me of NOT trying, I gave you so many warnings, so if you’re spoiled from here, it’s on your own conscious, not mine.
The movie opened with one of the most heartbreaking scenes to date.
If you saw Thor 3: Ragnarok, and you really should see Thor 3, it’s one of those films I would consider to be essential to understanding the plot arcs in Avengers 3, you should recall the end of the movie, when Asgard gets destroyed by Sutur , the people who lived on Asgard, fly away on a ship with Heimdall.
The movie opens on that ship with Thanos demanding the tessarect aka the space stone. Loki, of course, being the awesome bastard that he is, stole the stone from Asgard [But would you expect anything less from Loki?]. Meanwhile the Hulk is there too, and even he can’t beat Thanos to a pulp despite how angry he was getting, and just as Thanos was about to kill The Hulk, Heimdall, uses the bifrost to send Hulk to Earth, and Thanos stabs Heimdall to death.
But I mean… Isn’t Heimdall supposed to be a god? How the fuck do you kill a god? Aren’t gods supposed to be immortal. But I suppose Norse Gods aren’t exactly like Greek or Roman gods because in actual Norse Mythology, the Norse gods are always fucking each other over and stabbing one another in the back especially during the actual events of Ragnarok [as in the mythology version, not the Marvel version.]
Then Loki to spare Thor’s life gives Thanos the space stone, but then being the cunning tricky bastard he is, he tries to stab Thanos, and of course fails. RIP LOKI, I AM STILL NOT OKAY WITH THIS DEATH!
So everyone’s favorite frost giant bastard gets killed in the first ten minutes of the movie, so already you know that THIS IS NOT GOING TO BE A HAPPY MOVIE!
Anyhow Hulk lands on Earth after the death that I am still not over, and just so happens to fall right into the New York Sanctum where Dr. Strange and Wong are waiting, and Hulk is now Bruce Banner and warns them that Thanos is on their way. Bruce calls Tony Stark, and he joins them, and tells Tony he’s gotta call Steve Rogers aka Captain American even though the two of them are not on speaking terms after Captain America: Civil War, and Stark is about to do so when they’re attacked by Thanos’ minions, who want the time stone that Strange has, and probably also want Vision’s Mind Stone. Peter Parker aka Spiderman also somehow drags himself into this fight.
I have to say, the dialogue between Dr. Strange and Tony Stark was probably my favorite part of the movie. I might ship them now.
Then the scene shifts and Thor finds himself face to face with the Guardians of the Galaxy, including a teenage Groot, who reminds me so much of a typical high school student. He’s addicted to video games and has a foul mouth, and is probably one of the best characters ever.
There is more amazing dialogue between The Guardians of the Galaxy and Thor, and then Thor goes off with Rocket and Groot because you know he needs some sort of weapon to define his masculinity since his hammer is no more, to Nidavellir. The rest of the motley crew go off to Knowhere to try to get the reality stone from the most metro Marvel character ever: The Collector
Meanwhile back on Earth, Vision and Wanda are trying to make their relationship worked when they’re attacked by Marilyn Manson er Proxima Midnight, who seriously looks like a female Marilyn Manson. They’re saved by the Avengers, who have gone into hiding since Civil War, and they all decide to go to Wakanda, to try to remove the stone from Vision’s head.
I could tell you the rest of what happens, but then I really would be spoiling the entire movie for you. Basically you have Team T’Challa in Wakanda and Team Stark on Titan, and then Thor and friends being the random players. AND THEN THERE’S LOTS OF FIGHTING.
So that sets up the climax and conclusion of the movie.
Anyhow here’s what I learned from the movie… Thanos is basically like Mary Fucking Poppins
He goes around to different planets and adopt the orphaned children like Gamora and Nebula, and has has them form the army of The Children of Thanos, where he raises them, brainwashes them, and makes them do his bidding.
As a villain, I think Thanos looks like a purple version of The Thing from 2005’s Fantastic Four.
But he’s an interesting villain. If I was classifying him via a D&D type alignment, I would classify him as being lawful evil. He really does feel like he’s doing the right thing. By getting rid of 1/2 of humanity’s population, and it’s a random selection, it’s not like he’s picking and choosing who to get rid of, the resources that are left and the population that is left will thrive and be successful. He’ll be their god and they will be grateful to Thanos for saving humanity.
He also had a conscious. In order to get the soul stone [and we saw the Red Skull on Vormir, as well], Thanos had to sacrifice something he loved to get the stone. Gamora mocked him and told him that he didn’t love anything, but well fuck, turned out he loved her, and he sacrificed her life for the stone, and in the one scene we got to see within the Soul World in the Soul Stone, we see a young Gamora asking him if he succeeded and what it cost, and solemn Thanos answered “Everything.”
Though it’s love that also fucked over Stark’s plot to get the infinity gauntlet from Thanos on Titan because Starlord is a fucking idiot, and let’s his emotions get in the way of logical decision-making.
And Thanos does succeed in what he was out to do thanks to Dr. Strange basically just giving him the time stone, if he spares Stark’s life, and then telling Stark that it was the only way as he turns into dust. And if anyone would know it, it would be Strange since he looked into the future, and saw thousands of different outcomes and there was only one that the good guys were successful.
THOUGH I AM NOT OKAY WITH GROOT DISINTEGRATING AT ALL!!!
The movie ends with so many of our heroes gone. There’s no Groot, Winter Soldier, Black Panther [though I mean he has tons of more movies coming out, so you know he’ll be okay], Spiderman, Dr. Strange, Scarlet Witch, Starlord, Mantis, or Drax [though Guardians of the Galaxy 3 is coming eventually, so we know they’re not really gone either!].
Then there was that mysterious scene at the end, literally at the end of the credits [ALWAYS STAY THROUGH THE END CREDIT AT ANY MARVEL MOVIE!] where Nick Fury and Maria Hill also disintegrate , but not before Nick Fury manages to send a page to Captain Marvel, who happens to have her own movie coming out in March 2019, so she will play a big part in the Avengers 4.
So, at the end of the movie we have:
Nebula/Stark on Titan
Captain America/Black Widow/Okoye/M’Baku/Banner/Thor/Rocket in Wakanda
Shuri is not shown at the end of the movie, neither is Tong, which makes me think they’re still alive because they’re significant characters and if they were not going to be spared, I think it would have been shone.
Hawkeye was not in this movie nor was Ant Man even though they were both in Captain America: Civil War.
We know Antman and The Wasp will be appearing in their own movie come this summer, and set photos of Jeremy Renner, who plays Hawkeye have been released, so we know he’s in Avengers 4, and I’m sure Antman and The Wasp will be playing a big part of that movie, as well.
But what happened to everyone else?
I like to think that their souls were transported into Soul World, which I suppose is technically like purgatory- a realm between life and death. I mean, after all, Gamora was there, and she died. So maybe all the other people’s souls were transported into there as well, and they’ll either be somehow resurrected because the soul is the essence of life, or maybe all the souls will team up and they’ll finally defeat Thanos in the Soul World.
Then of course, Nebula is still alive too, and in the actual comic book arch, Nebula is the one who manages to defeat Thanos and she takes control of the soul gauntlet, that doesn’t mean Avengers 4 will play out like that, but the fact that she is still alive seems very insignificant. Also, Stark obviously is an important player too, since Strange was rather insistent that Thanos spares his life, and since Strange actually looked into the future.
Also, most of the ORIGINAL Avengers are the ones who are alive- Stark, Thor, Captain America, Black Widow, and Hulk are still alive, and their contracts don’t last forever. So that’s probably significant in a way. Maybe the next movie will be the death of the original Avengers [and in the comic book, Bucky aka The Winter Soldier does become Captain America] and the birth of a new team [Black Panther, Winter Soldier, Scarlet Witch, Spiderman, Dr. Strange, Captain Marvel, Ant Man, etc].
Well, at least there’s only a year until we find out how this movie concludes.
It was an amazing movie. I mean I saw it a day ago, and I’m still thinking about it, and spending hours of my life reading Marvel Wiki, any movie that continues to make you think, even after it’s done, is a good movie, in my opinion, I feel the same way about good books.
Is it 2019 yet?